The love of my life: Happy 50th Birthday Mama

 Kereta mama

1988
She sat alone in the ward in a remote area of General Hospital of the state of Kedah, waiting to give birth to her fourth child. Her husband was not there, he had matters to attend to. Those were the days when the luxury of mobile phones were not available. He had to walk into the place he attended the next day to receive a phone call that his wife had given birth to their first baby boy. At least the child had one of his parents with him. Thats why heaven is bestowed under the depth of a mother's sole. No matter who you are, the one present at birth is your mother. The agonising pain, the long hours of crippling contraction ended at 4.30am, 16th June. his face brought ease to her. Thank you mama for giving birth to me. Thank you Allah for my life and my mother.

Kereta ayah

1992-1993
Somewhere along the line, she taught her son to save up. He remembered they had these empty nescafe jars as their piggy banks to keep their change and coins in. It was getting heavier and heavier by day. But one day, he couldn't stop himself from stealing a few to get an ice cream. She found out and gave him a sound warning. She taught him if he wanted things, all he had to do was ask her. If she had it, she'll give it to him, the fact that stealing is never acceptable.

Kereta Kak Manar

1995
They moved to Huddersfield a year prior to this date, her husband had secured a place to pursue his philosophy doctorate. Her son was playing outside with friends, who were children of her friends. By this time, she had had another 3 children. There were 7 altogether. She watched her son play football with a tennis ball. It was common back then for children in primary school in the UK to play football using a tennis ball. It was the only type of ball allowed in school playing grounds. Proper sized footballs were only allowed on grass pitches. Anyway, she was standing in the doorway, a few steps higher than were her son was playing football. The steps were their goalmouth, and he was hammering shots into the steps, just below where she was standing. "Be careful witht he ball, we've got guests here!" She reminded her son no to lose his composure. Out of nothing, the ball sat up and he put his laces through the ball. He hammered in a really fierce shot. Unfortunately, it flew up higher than the steps, higher than her knees, up to the level of the tip of her shoulders. Her 7th child was asleep against her shoulder. It flew straight into the back of the sleeping baby's head. he was merely a year old. Guilt drenched the boy. His little brother starting crying. He an towards her and apologised immediately. He asked her to give him a knock on the head as a punishment. She looked at him through her motherly eyes, "i told you to be careful. Knocking your head won't make your brother stop crying. Things happen and I know it was an accident, ok? Don't worry." Tears flooded his eyes. He could only imagine getting beaten up but for that to come out from her mouth, he couldn't have imagined another motherly figure to stand in front of him.

Kereta ayah 2

1998
They came back from the UK a year ago. He's currently in standard 4 in primary school and she teaches English in the same school. In fact, she teaches him English at school. He resented having her as his teacher. In spelling classes, if another student got it wrong, the get a tap on the back of the hand with her wooden ruler. But him, she would wack the palm of his hands until it glowed red. He never saw how she wanted him to be the best, in fact, to get the best out of him. All he knew was she was being unfair. Such oblivion.

There was once an incident where she promised to take all her children out to buy know school uniforms. She had told then 2 weeks in advance, so that when the day came, they would have their lists of stationaries ready and all other stuff they need. Her son was excited. He stayed up late preparing his list, checking double over and again just to ensure nothing slipped his mind. He thought if he missed this opportunity, he would have to wait for next year. But he never knew that his mother would buy him the neccessities with a huge smile. Being able to aid her son's education was more than she ever wanted. She woke him up the next day, urged him to get ready because it was already late in the morning. He was very sleepy, the aftermaths from staying up late the night before. everyone else were ready, they were waiting for him. He dragged his feet slowly into the shower, letting the water run while he stood aside, eyes closed, shivering. Suddenly, the sound of the Toyota Unser caught his ears, the slamming of the metal gate of their house. He was out the shower in a dash, shot into his clothes and raced for the door. Too little too late they say. They left him at home. Enraged, infuriated and blood boiling inside him, he schemed a plan of revenge. He raced to the kitchen, pull open a drawer and yanked out a pair of garden scissors. Next stop, her orchid garden. He knew she nurtured the plants and took every pride in her flowers. He also knew that was where it would hurt her most. Walking through her collection of orchids, he snipped every blooming orchid flower he saw. By the end, there were merely stubbles with full bloom beheaded orchids on the floor.

He lied down in his room, and cried. Out of anger for being left behind, and also for hurting her. There was only one feeling in him afterwards. The utmost regret. She came home with the others, all happy with their new uniforms and Luna colour pencils. She stopped dead in her tracks, picked up an orchid and looked bewildered. What happened? Then only did the trail of orchids catch her eyes. She stormed inside, dumped all the shopping inside and ran upstairs to her room crying. Her husband was there, dazed. As her story unwound, he summoned their bad son and talked to him. The son expected a blow to the face, but his heart broke when he saw that she didn't even bother. She just sat there weeping. He went to her and apologised. Through her sobbing and flow of tears, she held her son and said its ok. It wasn't worth it because she still took him out shopping a fortnight later. Which mother wouldn't?

Kereta Kak Wah

2000
It was the end of the primary school era. He scored 5As in his UPSR and applied for boarding school. He also applied for Maahad and normal secondary school. The normal transition paperwork in the latter. It was the very end of 2000 then, 2weeks before school reopened. He still had not got any confirmation for the secondary school he would attend if his application to boarding school or maahad failed. He was worried, but she stood beside him. She took him to the PPD (district education office) and personally asked a favour from one of her friends there to hand check if her son's application was there. To their horror, they never received such a thing. His application never got to them. She was furious, and made it a personal matter to find out what happened. After elaborated efforts, she found out that one of the administrative personel in the primary school had bad intention towards her and her son. That person offered to hand in her son's application, using the catch phrase "oh its ok, I'm going to the PPD after this. I can in your son's along with my daughter's if its easier for you." Help from a trusted friend, she handed in the application. That was the last time they ever heard of it. Luckily, he was offered a place at Sek Melayu Jln Station. Scrap that form, truth prevails eventually.

Kereta Kak Muna

2001-2005
Every year, she would come to her son's secondary school for 2 reasons: 1, to send him off at the start of a year and 2, to attend the awards ceremony. He worked hard because he always made it a personal aim to try to be the best. He inherited that from both his parents. They never failed to attend, come what may. The proud feeling of an achievement is not when he shook the hands of The Sultan of Perak, or the Minister of Education or whoever the VVIP was throughout his 5year stay. It was handing the certificate of merit to his parents for them to read and to take a photo with them. It was seeing them shake hands with parents of high achievers alike and know that their child is one of the best. creme de la creme. It was the feeling of something worthwhile, and being able to share it with his parents. His mother especially, who always gave him a backbone in testing times. He learnt that the only way to repay them, was to be among the best yet again. He graduated as the highest CGPA achiever with an accumulated 3.88 over 5years, pipping tough contest from colleagues. He drove himself to become the Victor Ludrum (sportsman of the year) receipient for 2years in a row, spurred on only by the words of his parents to better their achievements.

Motor Abang

2006
He secured a scholarship for overseas studies and did his preparation at Kolej Islam Jln Labuhan Dagang. It was the fiercest place for competition. It was the first time he saw friends turn into foes, a dog eat dog world. Nevertheless, she told her son nothing is impossible. No matter how many times he failed puremaths, she never gave him stick but instead told him to never say die. Its never over before he started. When she gave birth to him, little did she know she gave birth to an endless fire inside him, which burnt strong in times of hardhsip. She passed on her will to him. 2 years flew by and he realised that his relationship with his parents was improving. They talked a lot more, shared things that he used to share only with peers. It was time to become a matured person to him. He graduated yet again, not failing to hit the stage and light up the face of his beloved mother and father. He could only bite back tears when he handed over to her a rose during his graduation ceremony. A river of love was flowing from her eyes. As he hugged her, he sensed an accomplishment, she was proud of him. All he did was for his mama and ayah. Eventhough he wasn't the best in his batch this time around, but he was up there with the best. In fact, everyone there that day were the best in their own parent's eyes. They waded chin deep through thick and thin and their parents couldn't have been more proud than to attend a graduation ceremony.

2008
It was time for the long goodbyes and see-you-agains. He took off to a land only fresh in his childhood memories. Again biting back tears, he hugged her for the last time before he walked through the gate. Everything is still vivid to him up to this very day. How his mother cried, tears of joy, pride, love, sadness. A turmoil of an ocean of emotions. He only had one aim: to come back and to kiss the hands that brought him up and to hug the person who fed him his 1st meal. He wanted to come back to see his mama. And he made it his insipiration for the years to come.

2009
Everyone left for Motherland during the summer holidays. He stayed behind because he needed surgery on his knee. It was then or never. She told him, to it on their own accord, they couldn't afford it. If he did it there, it was for free. She assured him it was the best option, and so he stayed back for the surgery. Luckily, there were seniors who came back early or went back late to keep him company. He was grateful for them. Loneliness was kept at bay most of the time. Until a few days after Eid-ul-Fitr of 2009. He called his mother, the person he missed so much to have a chat. However, the whole family were out visiting relatives on that blessed day. He was told to call back later, hopefully his mother would be free by then. He tried again later, only to find that all had gone to sleep from exhaustion. The same thing happened the next day. All he wanted was to skype with his family, ask for forgiveness from his beloved mama and ayah. Being the selfish child, he belted out his frustration by saying that his family were having fun, and that he was the forgotten son. He hung up the phone and sulked alone. Later that night, his mother called on skype. He was still sulking, acting like a 5 year old. She tried to reason with him, telling him that he was not forgotten. Unable to break her son's fortress, she slumped and tears of sadness rolled down her cheeks. "How could you say that mama has forgotten u when I regret not being there for your knee surgery? How can you say we've forgotten you when each house I visit, I'm asked about you? Don't you think I miss my son?" Her dam of tears cracked and she let out her emotions. He was struck with shame, even disgusted by his actions to even accuse her of that. They cried together on skype. When emotions were finally out of the way, he greeted her with the same Eid-ul-Fitr greeting he says each year. "mama, I ask for your forgiveness, for all my wrongdoings, be it implicitly or explicitly. I ask you to make halal for all that you've fed and gave me, and please, pray for the success of your son in this world and the world to come". And like the years that have passed into history, she shook her head in agreement, smiled and said "ok, don't miss your prayers, study hard and insyaAllah He will make you among the best of mankind".


2010
This year flew by, and he had only one thing in his mind: to go home to his mother. For every lecture note he studied, every lecture he went to, every exam paper he sat for, she was his inspiration. She was the underlying motivation. It was all for her. He boarded the aeroplane with one aim: to go back and make her happy.

Ayah and mama: shot taken at UIA (Madihah's enrolment)

This 9th of July, my mama turned 50. She half a century old but my love for her is ever growing. I thank you for all you've done for me mama. I love you with all my heart. I wish you the greatest of health, granted longevity in the midst of imaan, neverending good furtune and rezq, blessed with success and happiness in this world and the life to come. There are no words to describe how I feel. You're the best mama in the world and I can only say it again, I love you.

p/s: note the licence plate number for all the pictures above. We dedicate them all to my mama's birthday. 9th of July, 1960 (9760)